Time it takes before they get any.......

People make mistakes. Many of them are really stupid ones. What we dont realize is that the effect that these mistakes can have. In the case of married/engaged/doing-timepass-and-dont-give-a-shit -about-the-future types, mistakes can usually effect one thing. SEX (which will henceforth be referred to as Giggity Giggity Goo). Depending on the nature of the mistake, the punishment or 'the time it takes before they get any' can vary.

Mistake commited by the Guy -- Time taken before he gets any

1) Telling her that she cried like a little baby while watching one of her girly movie -- 4 days

2) Telling her that the saas-bahu soaps that she watches are full of sh*t -- 2 days

3) Failure to be serious during answering of a quiz from Cosmopolitan -- 3 days

4) Shushing her during ESPN Sportscenter -- 8 days

5) Actually saying "No I dont want to go" when she says "It's ok if you dont want to go" -- 6 days

6) Not answering quicky or vehemently enough when she asks if you would ever cheat on her -- 12 days

7) Suggesting the idea of a "threesome"......
..... with her friend -- 2 days
..... with her sister -- 20 days
..... with her mother -- 6 months

8) Using Logic -- 6 days

9) Using the 'told you so' when she screwed up something really bad -- 7 days

10) Shrugging ur shoulders and grunting when she asks how the makeup she just spent an hour and a half putting on looks -- 2 days

11) Using any expression other than "making love" to refer to sex -- 4 days

12) Accusing her of "having PMS"...
..... when she doesnt -- 8 days
..... when she does -- 12 days

13) Scratching your privates and asking her"wat the hell did u give me" -- 3 months

Mistake commited by the Girl -- Time taken before she gets any

1) Ordering some psychic stuff from amazon and running up a bill for 10,000 -- 1 hour

2) Running off with the neighbour , but coming back after a week -- 1 hour

3) Wrecking his car totally -- 1 hour

4) Selling his dog to a korean/chinese resturant -- 1 hour

5) Shredding his entire collection of collector's edition comics -- 1 hour

6) Buring all his clothes -- 1 hour

7) Killing his mother -- 1 hour

8) Accidentally enlisting him in the army -- 1 hour

9) Sleeping with his brother, the act being captured on a webcam and broadcast live on the internet -- 1 hour

10) Taping over his tape of India-Pakistan world cup watch with some cookery show -- 1 hour

I dont know about you people, but I really see a problem with calling women the weaker sex. The really weaker sex is the men here.

You can always disagree with me..


  1. Tell you what...This whole thing is so obscure to me as "I haven't gotten any"...Nor have been anywhere remotely close to "having gotten any"...
    But from the very poor GK that I have which can be attributed to Harold Robbins, Irving Wallace, Sidney Sheldon and Nancy Friday's novels, here's what it takes to get them into it (Or rather the turn on's):
    Action(and the thought in the mind of a woman):
    1. Speak in a gruff/coarse voice.
    2. Laugh at her PJs.
    3. Play Rugby or any other sport that involves hitting, beating, dashing/other brutal physical activities.
    4. Complement her cooking (even if you end up retching whatever you ate 3 days back).
    5. Sweat like crazy
    6. Read other Nancy Friday books/Irving Wallace's books (of his I-am-a-porn-author-now genre) for more such turn ons.

    For guys:
    1. Just Strip

  2. Some of them were truly awesome.. LOL

    And its a totally new concept..
    Keep the innovations going.. :)