Helmets Schmelmets

Before I start blogging any further, I would like to take my dear old thata(bhargav's) advice and stop all the profanity. So for the last time, FUCK!!! There, I got it out of my system.

Now that that is out is out of the way, a really weird thing happened in my office today.This event was preceded by a mail sent by some dude in my office. The mail read as follows:

"Dear Friends(friends, oh c'mon!!!!),

As as Monday i.e. November 6th, wearing helmets is absolutely mandatory inside the campus. All those failing to do so will not be permitted inside the office campus

Regards
Some dude"

A couple of things are to be noted here.
a) The above mentioned campus is about 40 acres big
b) 70% of the vehicular population are four wheelers
c) 70% of the total population are pedestrians

The mail really confused section b) and section c) i.e. the four wheelers and the pedestrians. This lead to some people carrying helmets to office(guess they must have got really weird stares in the buses they traveled!!!). The two-wheeler traffic didn't know if the rule applied to pillions too(coz most of the pillions were the girls who were freeloading of the poor, clueless guys). You know what this led to?? The highest absentism in the history of the organization. More people turned up the day we were protesting that belgaum shouldn't be parted off to Maharastra( Oh no!! not again, not after we gave away Kasargod and Hosur and half of AP)

This helmet rule really confuses me. I mean, I am all for safety and stuff, but just forcing you to protect one part of your body and will to let the other really really important parts(If you know what I mean ;)- ;-) ) are left vulnerable. I mean what use is your brain if your essential parts are functioning well. Its like a hotel without self-service or the other essential services. Nowadays, even brainless guys get laid easily, but guys with the bare essentials... nahhh, no chance... The government should keep this in mind and draft some new laws i.e. just like wearing a helmet is now mandatory, wearing of cups(i.e. ball guards) should be made absolutely mandatory. Funny when that will happen. Imagine the plight of the traffic cops who have to do routine checks :

Cop : Aaaa Stop!! Stop!!! I say...
Helpless dude : yes sir
Cop : Aaa pant bichappa... Remove your pant I say..
Helpless dude : But Sir...
Cop: Ehh Remove I say
Helpless dude : But Sir
Cop : Ehh.. Pant bichthiyoo illva gaadi seize maadlo
Helpless dude : saarr.. adhu.. urgentnalli ivathu kachane haakilla
Cop : (After the check up)Aaa.. this is the last and final warning...Next time eethara maadabeda..By the way, This is my fone no...call maadu... we shall meet up ;-) ;-)

If you ask me, I really dont like the way the government has dealt with this whole helmet business. I mean enforcing it on people is reallly wrong. It should be left on the discretion of the driver, you know. If driver says " Duh, I am soo stupid that I will not wear a helmet, Duh" then so be it.

The government should be concerned with the real issues. The Govt. of India should take a page of out CTS(cognizant's) books. Many of you were aware that CTS recently celebrates the company $1 billion worth by distributing free Ipods to all its employees. The Govt of India should also do something similar, you know. We, India, recently touched the 1 billion mark, in population that is(hooray???). The govt of India should celebrate this auspicious occasion by giving something away too... you know what???

CONDOMS!!!!

Jai Bharath!!!!

India ki Jai!!!!